Taking A Break!

Yes! Oh..., yes! The woman who unloads semis for a living - pushes, shoves, throws, places, heaves and lifts packages that average 25ish pounds, tore the ligaments in her lower back while..., drum roll, please..., squatting down, empty handed! Yes..., I said, squatting straight down with absolutely nothing in my hands! For heaven's sake - you have got to be kidding me!

No one heard me scream, as I squatted down, felt the tear and subsequent knife like pain shoot down my derriere and both legs. Damn! Not now! The timing is horrible, Paula! Just horrible! Okay..., now that you have screamed, immediately broke out into a heavy sweat..., just try to stand back up..., stand back up..., s-l-o-w-l-y. Yep..., tore the ligaments off your lower spine again - just above your tailbone. Damn - you already know it's a slow recovery process.

The first time I tore the same ligaments off my lower back was when Babe and I owned a FedEx route. Unlike UPS, FedEx drivers own their own trucks and purchase their routes - they are responsible for the whole schabang! Yes..., we earned our grand a week - working 14 to 16 hour days and got the pleasure of working together, side by side, once again, in our relationship. Anyway..., there we both were, large back door open on our "stretch" truck (the next size truck available is a box truck) and three large boxes of paper. Yep..., boxes large enough, that you can't get your arms around them - each weighing in at 75 lbs. As usual, Babe was responsible for driving the truck, (like a mad woman) organizing the stops and rearranging the packages so that the next few stops were readily accessible to me. In addition to removing items off of the top shelf (because I couldn't reach it) and storing the items we picked up (so that they would be separate from the items we delivered.) I was responsible for hanging on and not flying out the always open door and literally running, each and every package, in and out of an average of 150 stops a day. In essence, she drove and I delivered - day after day after day. I had the physical stamina and she had the 10,000 square mile route mapped out in her head. When you have a part city and part rural towns route - it adds up to 10,000 square miles! Unreal - it took us 1 hour and 20 minutes to arrive at the terminal every day at 5:00 am. Then we would review the load contents, finish loading what was left sitting outside the truck and leave the terminal at 6:00 am and then, drive 1 and 1/2 hours to our route. That means, each morning we spent almost four hours working, before we ever delivered a single package.

I think I got side tracked just a little there. Where was I, oh..., yes..., the paper boxes. We had two different caves on our route. Missouri is riddled with long, winding cavers underneath its hills - perfect place to store all sorts of items, as well as, house your business. So..., we were in the caves, backed in to the dock, door up and Babe goes inside this particular business to locate someone to sign for the packages. Okay..., uggggg..., I get the first 75 pound box of paper up off of the truck floor and onto the dock. Uuuugggghhhhh..., the second box is up and ready to be claimed. And then..., Uuuggghhhh followed by unintelligible screaming, cursing and tears. Yes..., I burst into tears because the pain was excruciating - and the snap/pop of my ligaments reverberated through the cave! And yes..., I was using proper lifting techniques and no..., I'm NOT out of shape! Should I have waited on Babe to help me - absolutely, with out a doubt, (hind sight is 20/20!) The reason I didn't seems stupid at this point - we had to rush all day in order to get all of those damn packages off of that truck and make our pick-ups on time! Learned this lesson the hard way (team lift means two or more people!) Paid for my poor judgement with: multiple doctor's visits, four weeks of bed rest, pain relievers, muscle relaxers, heating pad - four weeks of laying still and doing absolutely nothing. It was torture just lying there - like a complete idiot!

So..., my doctor lady tells me that with this type of injury - I will most likely re injure it sometime in the future. Okay..., I always stretch out my muscles before I begin unloading the truck or do some type of exercise. Well..., truth be known..., I seem to find myself stretching my muscles several times during the day - no matter what I am doing. Ever watched a cat for a prolonged period of time - they are always stretching their muscles - all day long. That is how I got the idea of stretching so much; besides, it feels good to me - really good..., to stretch out my back, arms, legs, torso, etc.... (I know, I'm weird and I don't care!)

This time, my doctor lady gave me another round of pain pills, anti inflammatory and three weeks of rest. Three weeks of rest - did I mention that we are packing because we are moving in approx. one week! Three weeks of rest - so..., Babe is supposed to pack and move all of our stuff by herself - I don't think so! Not happening in this house! We have formulated a workable plan - Babe moves what ever needs to be packed onto the kitchen table or couch. I grab a box, load it up with stuff and a lot of paper wads, tape it shut and write the contents on the outside of the box. Then, Babe lifts the package, puts it on the stack of "to go" boxes and brings more for me to pack. HA! No lifting, bending, stooping, squatting or straining of any kind! HA!

My doctor lady, who we have been seeing for about 8 years now, says to me, "Paula, I know that you are in great shape. I can tell by feel and by looking at you. Your lower back is just your body's weak point - everyone has a weak point in their body. Mine is my early onset arthritis..., I can't do several of the core building exercises, like slats, because my arthritis doesn't allow me the pleasure. So..., it is hard for me to keep my core in shape - it's just one of those things! Don't look up lower back exercises on the Internet (Ahh..., she knows my wife and I, all too well!) We need something tailored for you by a physical therapist, so that you can concentrate on the exact exercise that will help strengthen these ligaments!" She pauses and smiles, "Are those curls natural or did you use a curling iron?" We have been seeing her far too long, because we always end up talking about politics, the astronomical cost of health insurance, how the drug companies rip off the general public, or..., make up and hair ideas. You just never know what we are liable to talk about at my doctor's appointments.

Paula, "Its natural..., if I go to sleep with my hair wet, I wake up with these long curls in my hair. However; it only started curling up like this when I went gray!" Now, the two of us are examining the gray that is in my hair and Babe is watching and grinning away. "You have premature arthritis and I went gray in my early twenties - thank you mom!" Laughing as Babe starts playing with the toys located in the "kiddie" toy box.

The doctor lady, "So..., you know eating out is pure hell (yes she will curse in front of us because we are all comfortable with each other.) I mean pure hell..., my son just won't sit still and my husband and I end up chasing him all over the restaurant! It's embarrassing!"

Babe, nodding her head up and down, "Yes..., I remember those days..., 3 of them, running around, screaming at the top of their lungs, like crazed children on a permanent sugar high - sounding as if they were about to be hacked to pieces by someone! Everyone else staring at you..., with that look of - can't you control your child - my God, how many children do you have! Ever heard of birth control Lady?" We all laugh.